I have been accussed of many things. However when someone tells me they speak their mind, they will always be straightforward with me I expect them to. Not do it until it pleases them. Normally I would not be stressed and would have said "Fuck It" by now, but no...this matters to me. All the puerile actions I can push to the side and say "What is going on?" "Why are you reacting to me like thi?". Instead of hearing a lucid answer, I am receiving rebarbative comments. I can understand if someone does not agree with my personal choices, however to act the way they have been acting is taking a heavy toll on our friendship. Yet regardless of the moetic (my word) tirade, I am willing but they are not.
It took them 2 minutes to decide what they thought, without giving my concept a chance. My decision a chance. Without seeing something through my eyes for once and shot everything down like guns to a dove. Nothing has changed at all and because there is something they do not agree with, they react to me with such callow and mendacious mannerisms.
I can feel my choler rising when I think of it, because in the process I am loosing a friend. All because they do not agree with me about somthing that is my personal choice, like they have ever agreed to everything about my life before and in my time of need of just support and nothing more. Simply knowing they are there for me, the rugs is pulled beneath me.
What is even more stupid is, that even if things are "amended" I am not ignorant enough to not be able to acknowledge the fact that our this friendship will no longer stand the way it once did. It wlll not flourish. It will wither and slowly become this factictious platonic relationship. And even I can admit that hurts.
Another friend, who pushes me away for no reason. If I am not wanted, I leave and instead of saying go away they rather drag me through this.
It's a shame, I liked everything the way it was and it won't ever be the same. It will always linger at this nadir time era between us.
